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  1. #1
    I come in peace, seeking gold and slaves. Goodyear420's Avatar
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    Default Most BAMF Person You Can Think Of

    Through out history and literature, we've seen many a great BAMF. Men who wrestled bears, women who led armies, world leaders who would whip their dicks out to assert dominance, mutants that could be flung intot he sun and still not die, etc.

    The rules are simple:

    1.: Name your BAMF, they can be real, fictitious, dead, or alive, they just have to agreeably be Bad Ass.

    2.: Explain what Bad Ass feat they pulled off or Bad Ass feature about them.

    I'll start:

    Lyndon B Johnson.

    This guy is the reason you call your member a Johnson. Becoming president after JFK, he was kind of butthurt over the fact Kennedy was the subject of national talk for his sexual escapades even in death, that he's quoted as saying: "I've had more sex accidentally than Kennedy did on purpose." That's pretty ballsy, to say the least. But, his true bad assery comes from his Johnson, not his use of it. You see, word was it was huge. Big enough he nick named it Jumbo and was rather fond of whipping it out in public, especially inviting world leaders to go skinny dipping with him before they would start with diplomatic relations, to "establish genital dominance." The greatest thing he ever did with it, at one point during his presidency, Johnson met with a reporter who repeatedly asked him why American troops were in Vietnam. Frustrated, Johnson unzipped his pants, pulled out his "substantial organ" and shouted "This is why!" The craziest part of this story, which itself is nothing but pure, poop-eating crazy, is that it worked. That answer satisfied the reporter, like "Oh, yeah, when you put it that way, sure. Of course we're in Vietnam -- look at that dick. We should be in all countries. I'd be starting a war on space if I had a dick like yours. Come on, now." Suffice to say, Johnson's Johnson was the greatest part of his legacy, and probably one of the greatest contributions to the world the US has ever made.

  2. #2
    ID-10-T Maggoty's Avatar
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    Default

    I'm going to have to go with Gen. McAuliffe. Cut off and surrounded in a small place called Bastogne the Germans asked for his surrender. All the sane soldiers (damn legs!) Had run off and the Germans had enough men to crush any normal force in that position in a matter of hours.

    McAuliffe's answer? Nuts.

    A week later the Germans still hadn't broken them and that whole offensive stalled because they couldn't get supplies through Bastogne.

    And no, they didn't need Patton...


 

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